your bra strap is showing please hide it because it is suggestive. also your boobs are producing lumps in your shirt please hide them. your butt is in the same situation please get rid of it. also your legs. your arms. your face.
I can see your feet and it’s very distracting and slightly arousing.
WAIT A FUCKING SECOND THAT’S ME
I AM BIRD-ON-A-LEASH
THIS IS IT
THIS IS MY 15 MINUTES OF FAME I AM SO PROUD
we’re all like this weird combination of wade and sheen
With a dash of Vicky
And that vacuum that eats all the mother fucking food
and also that dude Spencer from iCarly
And a pinch of Oliver Oken
and a lot of Eric Foreman
Friendly reminder that Dreamworks created a character who not only displayed everything that’s wrong with Nice Guy Syndrome, but also turned into a supervillian when he was friend zoned.
send me a ship and I’ll tell you who:
- shops for groceries
- kills the spiders
- comes home drunk at 3am
- makes breakfast
- remembers to feed the fish
- decorates the apartment
- initiates duets
- falls asleep first